stronghold

“I suddenly realize that at this minute I am happy” (38).

while reading, i remember reading over this paragraph a second time. This was a wondrous moment for Meredith. That moment of happiness and sheer joy is so valuable. it is not something that you can just recreate. it is not something that you can fake either. that moment of realization is striking and it leaves you sitting there thinking about how you wished you could always be like this. speaking from a personal experience, i remember sitting there, looking around the room and thinking, "this is where i need to be. this is what i enjoy." i also remember thinking "is this really all i need to have a breakthrough like this?" Meredith's breakthrough was writing, mine was art. similar to Meredith, picking up that pencil and putting it to paper, there was just something about it that feels so comforting. it is an escape from what is happening in the chaotic world around you

the lonely hunter

“I am drifting in over my head and want my mother to grab me out of the tide” (6).

This is a metaphorical statement. Meredith of course is not drowning, but she is caught in a wave of hard times and I can understand where it is that she is coming from. When a young girl is trapped or upset or hurt, all they want is to be home with their mother. All they want is some motherly support and it seems to me that she is not receiving it. I can relate to her hard times, I have been down and upset and when I am I want nothing more than to go home and hug my mom after a long, hard day. It seems to me as though Meredith is trapped in a state of loneliness and she needs help getting out and wants to turn to that one person who is supposed to always be there for you.

shunned

“Shunning is supposed to keep bad things from happening in a community.  But it doesn’t correct the life gone wrong.  It can only expose the transgression to a very raw light, use it as a measure, a warn to others…” (xi-xii)

When someone does some thing that most people in the community frowned upon the entire community begins to shun that person. One example that is used in the memoir, Without A Map by Meredith Hall, is adultery. Getting pregnant at the age of sixteen is not something to be shunned for, in my opinion. I find it as a punishment in itself. I am only seventeen and I would have had the baby already, which means my social life would be over, all my money would go towards supporting my child, and I would not get the opportunity to live at college or anything. Also, knowing my parents would be ashamed in me as well is punishment enough, let alone the entire community.
The third sentence about the transgression, I believe is completely false. Just because they are shunning one poor girl for her wrong doing does not mean it will stop all the other girls from getting pregnant. It will not warn the others, it will just teach the others that she is only human and everyone makes mistakes. Mistakes are what make us human and that is how we learn, by our own mistakes. You can not learn from others unless it directly effects you.

Moloka'i

     "Rachel found herself wishing that the week would never end- that her father could stay here forever- but knew he couldn't. If there was one thing she had learned in her brief time at Kalaupapa, was that all things end" (Brennert 130).

     I drew this picture to sybolize that "all things end." Everyone that Rachel has been close to in her poor, short life had left her. It may not have been a choice but everyone she has ever gotten close to all left her. Her parents, and siblings, even her home. She has been moved around again and again without a choice. It's sad how at such a young age, Rachel has to know and deal with the pain of being alone. Rachel would crave a hug from her father, her best friend, and she couldn't get one because all her family life had to come to an end, just like everything else. Some people tend to get handed a bad hand and they just can't play the game as well as you wish you could. And Rachel got that bad hand and she's alone. She was forced to grow up too soon and there isn't anything she can do about it.

joy lock club onion peel

     Where to begin with this movie? I found this movie to be extremely moving but also aggravating. I absolutely loved this movie. At the beginning I was expecting this to be a boring uneventful movie that a teacher would show the class as a gap filler. When I originally saw the feather and the women talking at the beginning I remember whispering to Lex, "is there a point to this?" She told me I had to give it a chance. As the movie continued into the first scene, it immediately began to catch my attention. The names to the characters is definitely not my strong suit when it comes to the movie. I found the woman at the beginning to be extremely moving. I know that she's the mother of the young girl that did not want to play chess anymore so that her mother could gloat about her amazing daughter. That mother had an amazing story. She had this great ability to create this strangely believable story. The woman's ability to create this quick lie that would only work for her benefit. Also in her later years, she was able to hold her ground. Her daughter quit chess just to spite her mother and her mother pretended as though it didn't bother her. She held her ground. And as her daughter grew older, she felt as though her daughter did not care enough to prove herself worthy of her mother's affection. This entire movie about mother daughter relationships is all so realistic. There are some mothers that love their children unconditionally, which are the circumstances most frequently heard of. But no one knows what goes on behind closed doors. Any one that you meet could be the happiest person you know but they could go home and be constantly fighting with their alcoholic parents. This movie was a little insight on what goes on behind closed doors. For example, her daughter also fell for an American and her mother did not seem okay with it but she actually was. There was also the case of the woman and her husband who had a perfect marriage. They all seemed perfect and happy together when in reality the husband treated her so poorly. He would make her split the bills and was always fighting with her. The moral of this movie was that you can never know what goes on behind closed doors.

mary sutter assessment

Section A: Life lesson learned through a character, theme, conflict in novel.

     In the novel, My Name is Mary Sutter by Robin Oliveira, many lessons were being taught to the reader as the novel advanced. The main lesson that influenced me as a reader of the novel was to never give up. Mary was determined on become a stronger and more independent woman throughout the entire novel. Other characters including her own sister would try and make her suppress her beliefs. Even with all the negativity being pushed on her, she didn't let it affect her everyday life. I have heard people say "if you're told something enough you begin to believe it." Well this wasn't the case with Mary. Mary's sister, Jenny, believed in the easy way out. Jenny wanted to follow society's beliefs of a woman's role. Jenny wanted to be a stay at home mother who only focused on keeping her husband happy and to ensure that her children  are well taken care of. Mary believed she could be more than just a mother and a wife. She wanted to save people. Mary got her determination passed on to her through her mother. Mary and Jenny's mother was a nurse who helped the emergency soldiers that were wounded in the war. Mary witnessed her mother’s devotion to her job and vowed to one day be as committed as her mother once was. At times, Mary was continuously pushed down and told she was not good enough to become what she one day wished to be. Mary was not like the other women and she did not like that she was expected to follow suit and be a normal women. Mary found a way to persevere through the difficulty of constantly being told that she was not good enough to be what she wanted to be. When Mary pushed through the constant negativity she finally got to do what she loved and she was so respected for all of her hard work.
     Mary not only refused to give up on her dreams but she also never gave up on a patient. Mary told every wounded soldier that she would do everything she could to save them, and she did. She was told that she had to pick the ones to help and that she could not save them all. But she didn't listen. She wanted to save everyone. She never gave up on a single person who needed her assistance. Her job was extremely time consuming and overwhelming and she did not mind. She cared more about the wellbeing of the wounded soldiers with whom she was taking care of than she did about herself. On average Mary was required to do about thirty five amputations per day. That itself can take a lot of energy out of anybody no matter what the situation may be. Mary did everything she could for the men she took care of. Not only was she required to do the amputations but she was also needed to perform emergency surgeries on the men that were most likely to survive. Mary is extremely ambitious and always strived to do the best she possibly could. Mary devoted most, if not all, of her life trying to save these men.  Her mother was just as devoted as Mary. Mary had learned everything she knew through her mother. She grew up observing and witnessing how her mother rescued those in need of her help and she wished to one day become as empowering and as helpful as her mother had once been. She never gave up on her dreams of helping as many people as she possibly could. Dreams and life goals take determination and devotion. As difficult as it already is to accomplish the dreams that you set your mind to, it makes it even more difficult to be successful when there is the constant weight on your back of a family member holding you back. Jenny always told her sister to give up and that she was not good enough. Jenny's constant nagging did not seem to slow Mary down. Jenny's negativity seemed to make Mary stronger and more independent. Throughout the novel, Mary became more and more independent. She was never married. Of course there was someone that she fell in love with but Mary was more of an independent women. Her sister, Jenny, was the type of women who needed someone, needed a man as a backbone and that is why Jenny married the woman that her sister was in love with.
    Lessons you learn through books, observing other people, and  first hand experiences all carry you throughout your life. This novel has taught the readers many lessons that they may carry with them through the rest of their lives, but the main lesson that is being taught in this novel is to never give up. Always set your dreams high and never let someone tell you you are not good enough and to prove them wrong.

Section B: Quotation from the novel that speaks to you with response explaining why it resonates with you.

     Everyone has that one quote or saying that always stands out and resonates with I'm that individual. The quote that I found most recognizable in the entire novel, My Name Is Mary Sutter, was “But darling, life goes on, and this pain is just agonizing evidence” (Oliveira 229). I have wondered many times why this quote has made such an impression on me. After many puzzling days I finally decided why this quote made such an impact on me. Everyone has their own past, their own failure, their own pain, their own struggles, and there is no avoiding it. There is no way to change your past and there is no way to pause your life at a certain moment to cope with what has happened because life goes on no matter the amount of pain that you may feel in that moment. Yes, there are ways to avoid the pain, but the pain may teach you lessons. The pain of losing someone or the pain of someone leaving from your life abruptly can teach you lessons. And even though it may seem devastating and like the end of the world, you have to move on because life will go on without them. The pain you feel for them is just evidence of that. As the author, John Green, says in his novel, The Fault In Our Stars, “That's the thing about pain, it demands to be felt.” There are some emotions that are much simpler to hide but pain is not one. Whether it's physical or emotional turmoil, it will always be felt and difficult to hide that pain. Mary struggled to hide the pain of seeing the man she loved, love another woman. Mary had to live with the pain of observing her sister love the man that Mary had fallen in love with.

Section C: Explanation of character page.

     We were assigned to draw or create a picture or collage of some sort of interpretation of Mary's growth and development throughout the novel. I attempted to draw an image of Mary helping a wounded soldier. As she is helping this poor man the thoughts of her mother are in the back of her mind creating words of encouragement. Her mother was a nurse for the wounded soldiers which was what gave Mary the dream of helping people as much as her mother did. Her mother was the one who had taught her all her methods of treatment for those that had been injured. Mary had always been in her mother’s shadow when she was a child. She was constantly watching and observing her mother’s every steady and confident move in a desperate attempt to save each and every one of those men’s lives. Mary grew to learn and have dreams of her own. She dreamed to one day help as many people on need as she had seen her mother do the same. Mary had made those dreams a reality and helped and promise to save as many men as possible.

Section D: Where are you in your heroic cycle?

     I believe that I am still in the early learning stages of my heroic cycle. I wish to one day become a veterinarian and being a veterinarian is just like being a heroine. Only for animals and not people. As a child I found that I connected much better with animals than I did with other people. I still find that to be true. All through elementary school and middle school I would say that my pets were my best friends. I've had dogs, kittens, fish, rabbits, guinea pigs, chinchillas, if a pet store carried it, we owned it. As a child I didn't get along with the other students because they all viewed me as an outcast. So I would go to school and run home to see my family and pet. Even now that I'm in high school, my mother still calls me “the animal whisperer” and tells people that I “love my pets into submission.” I had a rabbit that I could carry around on its back like a baby. I now have a lizard called a bearded dragon that I walk around the house with it on my shoulder. Animals have always been what I love most. I only have a few more steps to follow in order to become what I wish to one day be. I've already decided what I wish to be. I have worked at animal clinics that have shown me what it takes to be who I want to become. All I have to finish is learning how to be what I wish. I need to learn how to save what saved me, what kept me sane. Without my dog, Molly, or my bearded dragon, Benny, I would go insane. Animals are my escape from the chaotic life of a teenage girl.

found poem

Love is
Supporting
Your family
Through
Thick and thin

True love is
Feeling
Butterflies
In the pit
If your stomach

Love is
Always